BLOG LOVE:)

Hellur,
Just wanted to share how excited I am fly girl Zandile featured yours truly on her fab blog:) If you get a second check out her blog that always keeps me fashionably inspired! Yep, those are her articles you see in Vibe and Vixen and I so wish I could fit in her suitcase for her trip to Belize . . .

Chocolate Flakes

If I were a cereal that's what I would be called.
I mean in the last two months I have flaked more than I think I have in my whole life. Not only will I accept an invitation for something than back out, I have invited folks to go somewhere than cancelled which is so much worse (sorry Sierra).
Yet still, in my physical incapacity to work hard and play harder, I still try extra hard to make sure anybody who calls me I call back or who shoots me a Facebook message I reply. I have horrible reception in my apartment which leaves minimal use for my phone at home and at work I'm well, at work, and still scratch my head as to why friends call me in the middle of the day and then wonder why I didnt pick up:)? So this leaves little opportunity to gossip on the phone.
And I admit it, I'm paranoid. I dont ever want to ever come off as "Im changing" or come off as too busy. Though I am busy, never too busy for my friends. And since graduation some of my friends also interested in magazines have sort of fallen out of pulled away from me which makes me sad, but that's a whole nother topic and post.

So why all the rambling?

Well, Im saying all this just to say after working very hard to stay connected with folks and having paranoid moments where I actually get up early in the morning to scroll through facebook to make sure I didnt skip someone's message or wall post, which is insane as Monday I got home in the AM with the team, Be sure to check out the Mel B. story (Eddie Murphy know he WRONG for planning that pregnancy with her then fronting like it wasn't his . . .and he is def "How You Doing"), I am hypersensitive to someone acting like Im ignoring them or not making an effort to K.I.T as my 7th grade yearbook would say. I'm sorry for preaching to the choir because obviously they don't read the blog which I really appreciate you doing.

Anywho, yeah the Vixen news SUCKS. For a second when I didn't see any reports I thought I might have gotten bad info and had a glimmer of hope. This is one of the rare times I hate my info was indeed right as mediaweek confirmed. At least Vixen isn't completely going away and with the site staying me and Kish were saying if you're interested in mags or media the web is def growing . . .and where they're hiring in our cases. And Jameil and La? I did end up wearing White to that White Party . . .and you know Shani O totally did not! We had margaritas the next day and you know which one I just had to try .. . . the Watermelon:)

CJ

DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!

I can relate to how Esther Rolle felt when James died because today i learned a close family member passed. She was like a sister . . . Rest in Peace VibeVixen magazine. I had heard whispers the magazine was not doing as well as hoped throughout the year but I wasn't trying to hear that. Read my post from last year" , I had hoped to maybe work there. At that time I also was hoping to maybe work at Jane. God works things out the way they should be, but my heart is hurting as two of the magazines I actually buy and read have folded in the last month.



I got an email yesterday that Vixen was closing but the source was some obscure blog so I shrugged it off. Then today I get the news at work and am bummed. As a young black girl in magazines, when a magazine for young black girls folds it's personal. It's my livliehood we're talking about. It's the livelihood of folks I know and love we're talking about. Out at dinner last month with Tai, the deputy editor and Erika, the art director who were cool enough to take time out of there schedules to hang with us. Not only that, though as much as it sucks they are a very talented staff and I am sure will all bounce back, its the fact that a magazine for young black fly women can't seem to survive. There's Jewel that my co-worker was formerly the editor in chief, but doesn't thave the finanical backing to be all it can be. but other than that we don't have anything strictly for us. It's like advertisers are saying "You don't exist" Yall know how I felt about "my beloved Honey" . Then Suede came and left before I was fly enough to truly appreciate it. Now Vixen. i guess the online magazines will have to suffice for now . . .I do like Clutch and Candy Apple rocks . . . .and shameless plug, Essence gets cooler everyday (if you get a sec check "my interview with the Christie's" )
heading to DC tomorrow to hang with my fam coming to town for a funeral for my grandmother's sister who passed. I'll mourn for my Aunt Ruth and my sister Vixen . . .

I guess I'm a roach

Put away the raid but it definitely seems to be true. Everytime I say I went to Howard (which rolls of my tongue a lot easier now. I use to choke when I first said that as for the last four years its been I "go there" not "went"), people respond, "Yeah, y'all like roaches. Y'all everywhere."
HBCUs are definitely deep in the city (with Morehouse leading the pack it seems . . .or the most boisterous where they went to school . . .uhm:) Yesterday on the 3 towards the end of the line and my stop at 148th I see a girl who graduated last year and also works in magazines get on.
We talk: She lives on 147th - with another of my good friends in magazines. I live on 149th. It's good to see her though she is so not with my "new york is the best place for a single black woman to date" theory. It does have its holes. And reading Gotham Diaries on Z's suggestion doesnt help my mind that already thinks 90% of guys are suspect.
As Kenya put it "Everyone is black and gay till proven otherwise"
So as me and my fellow alum get off the train together as we both live seconds from the stop, someone taps me on the shoulder. It's freaking Jozen and I def feel that whole roach thing in full affect. It wouldnt have been so shocking to see him if it werent for the fact we were IMing earlier and I had JUST responded to his facebook note that advertised his column on "Essence Hates Regular Guys" for KING Mag's website where he is the online editor.
Me and Jozen go way back (damn Im sounding old:) when I was a the freshman on our campus newspaper staff and he was a senior and the entertainment editor. He was great and interviewed diddy that year when he came for homecoming. he also had this column Jozen's Jargon and from that KING column he still is speaking a lot of bull:)

If you are not fortunate to know and havent had me IM or facebook you to annoyingly tell you the 2007 DoRight Men are here well . . . .ESSENCE'S 2007 DoRight Men are here!!!!!!!! They are up on the site and getting amazing hits. Starting soon you can vote for your favorite one for a chance to meet the most popular guy in paradise! There's even a quiz yours truly had a hand in creating that matches you to you perfect Do Right match.
So after all we did to give overworked black women a little hope of what's out there, Jozen writes his column from King, the black man's T&A Bible and why guys look at us crazy if we cover up or don't give it up the first night, right:)?
He makes points we might have entertained had he not been in such a hypocritical place. Like I keep saying . . . at least we have standards for our eye candy! Even if they are aspirational. As my president Obama says, You have to have the audacity to hope!!!! And don't think Im being hard on Jozen, he lives to get people rilled up and wanted me to email it to the staff and let him in on their response. I felt weird for helping him get a jpg of the cover, which I did obviously before I knew what the column was about.
Let me know who your favorite Do Right guy is. Mine was the Prince though their rumors he's with Sanaa, which Im cool with since they could be cute together. But seriously I like William Branch and entertained the fantasy of Kiel just because he's in the city and factchecking his charity involvement was really inspiring. Would I seriously ever try and talk to or try and contact any of these guys? NO (and not just because that would be kinda unethical since I work where I work). But do we all like a little fantasy? Yep, Jozen, my neighbor who lives across the street (how weird is that), we all like a little fantasy . . .

later,
CJ

*Im heading to the white party of another Howard guy tomorrow. His girlfirend said its cool, but am I doing too much to wear silver (my dress from H&M)? I just dont have sexy white . . .

Why googling yourself is so important . . .

If I hadnt, I would not have known my article on Vintage Vixen style on Vixen's site I pitched and wrote a few months back actually made the site (Shanel rocks!!!). Though I feel a little hypocrital, because outside of Cotton Club, I have never felt comfortable in red lipstick:). I am such a retro child so platforms are always near to my heart . . .and the closes closet, so this was right at home and way easy. Even though Im barely experienced, I do tell folks all the time write what you know . . .

let me know what you think.

CJ

The Irony of it All

So, yesterday.
I spent some much needed time with my main girl. I mean I see her all the time but haven't made sure she is really okay.
Me and myself had some serious quality time and I loved it and am proud to report she's doing just fine:).
I started the day with a morning of beauty. And Damn if my mango sea salt body scrub from carol's daughter didnt make me feel like luxirating in it allll day. I wanted to kick myself for not using it more often. I got up kinda late after treking out to the Clinton Hill area in Brooklyn with Arion looking for this restaraunt that turned out to be a total bust. But right next to it was this place called Thai 101 and I got her, Rachel and Anna to try it out and it was great. I know thai is not the hottest thing any more but I still love it. After that we hit Strata which was cool and the night just reminded me how fun it can be to hang with your girls.
Arion spent the night and as I brewed iced tea the next morning, I thought I'd try out my new waffle iron. Well, I didnt grease the iron enough making my virgin waffle stick all to the iron, turning breakfast plans from waffles to pancakes on the stove.
After Arion leaves to go study for her final test in bartending school (Shani O already passed . . congrats! and hope you arent still mad at me. Sent a peace offering by Ari), I head to 125th to go do what any nerd must do when moving to a new place: get my library card!!!
I talked to Elle on the way who first took me by this library location and the girl tells me I am cutting it close by coming for the card at 4:30 when the library closes at 5pm.
I feel myself being all productive as I drop off my tan and white polka dot dress to be hemmed at this alteration shop owned by the cutest older west indies couple. We both liked the other's accent though, she made me nervous when she mentioned a lady from tennesse and I thought she was implying I sounded Memphis-y (not that anything's wrong with TN, don't hit me Sugar Foot;)
At 34th for a little shopping (that H&M buy one get one free sale is SICK. Ive gotten four dresses including my new fav dress -silver short one with hoodie pockets in the front), my homie Kristin calls to say her and our friend vanessa are heading to the Paris Theater to see La Vie En Rose based on the life of Edith Piaf. I'm so down and head to 58th street. As I get off the train and check out Central Park where the two were hanging earlier and invited me to come read with, I actually feel like a New Yorker.
The movie . . .AMAZING! Her life is so beautifully tragic if there is such a thing, and the actors were all so freaking talent - even the little girl who plays her as a child and pretends to be blind for a little. It didnt even matter if it was all in french because heart ache is heart ache and love is love.
This woman's life is fascinating and I was so glad to be friends with Kristin and Vanessa. Ive lived in black neighborhoods and went to black school's my whole life so I truly appreciate friending these girls last summer with only three black girls in our program and they are the ones I related to the most because like me, they TOTALLY ROCK:).
People are just people and sometimes in my black bubble I need that reminder. Thats Kristin in the middle and Vanessa on the end in her dress she had just got from Zara on sale. I totally called her out for her "it was going to be cold in the theater and I only had a tank top on" excuse for buying that amazing frock:) As Kristin said, so you couldnt get a sweater? The French lady we asked to take the pic moved the camera the first time before the picture took. Though she took another with our faces in it, I like this one.
So I went to church today and it was great. Just what I needed to know that its ok to be happy and nothing is wrong if everything feels so so right in your world. Me and roomie went to Amy Ruth's afterwards then went to the beatuy supply store to buy some hair as I hooked up her first ever weave and grabbed a italian ice along the way.
I'm always excited when someone says they read the blog, and Rachel gets double kudos for complimenting my cooking (I live for a compliment on my food and driving since my long-time friends clown me on both)!!!!! Also I was so pumped when the freakishly talented Z, who I totally have a girl crush on, told me she checked on Weapons of Mass Seduction after I talked about. Speaking of girl crushes . . .the honesty box is going GREAT and as my classmate Oprah would say, Im feeling the love!!!!
Let me get ready because Im heading to an open mic with Sierra. Ill tell you how that goes.
the irony of it all? there is no irony. Life goes on and Im trying to live it up

God Bless,
CJ

The Family Reunion . . .

So I make my way to Atlanta late Thursday night. Leaving work to go to the airport I could not catch a cab in the middle of Manhattan and then it starts to rain. Im actually calm and thinking as long as I make to my hometown all is well. As we get to the airport my mini van driver (the random guy who comes as Im trying to flag cabs and tries to overcharge me to get to Laguardia like I haven't caught a cab there from work) says the airport looks mighty empty and that a lot of flights had been cancelled in the last few days. I make it to curbside check in and am nervous my flight isnt a cancelled one. The guy tells me the 8pm flight is cancelled. Lucky for me Im on the 9pm flight which has been delayed until 10:30pm.
So that turned into 11pm but all that matters is I made it. i felt bad for folks who had been there all day and had flights pushed back hours, just for them to wait all that time and the flight get cancelled 10 minutes before they are to board and they announce the next flight to that city is saturday morning, as we wait on thursday evening.
So I make it to Atlanta.
Friday morning after a huge argument with Mom Dukes I head to the dentist. With my dental insurance expiring the next day I am hoping to get this root canal fixed and maybe a filing or two. She sits me down and says all they can do today is xrays and a check up though I know exactly what I need. At the counter I start crying as she tells me how I could have seen a dentist in NY before the insurance expired and Im just frustrated to be uninsured and completely make the other nurses get on my nurse for making me cry. So wasn't her fault. Well, after an eventful morning and the bank of america outside the bank malfunctioning with my card inside and the lady at the bank acting like she's doing me a favor by helping a machine she then says they already knew acts up, me and my mom make it to Charlotte for the family reunion.

How was it? Just what I needed. Grounded me. Made me put some things in perspective and remind me how cool it is to have a family that is stuck with you.
I got to spend some time with my lovely sister cousin Aisha, who is doing her thing on a golf scholarship at Hampton, but she'll always be that bratty cousin who always feels like no time has past when we're reunited. Summers in South Carolina, we use to take baths together and iron skirts (the washcloths) with the iron (the soap) . . .until the time we got in a fight and they put a end to our baths. Even now, she still brings the kid out of me from the candy we stock up on at Walmart to our constant quotes of our fav movies Jawbreaker and Mean Girls. Her sister is the one I was suppose to babysit for.

It was great to see my grandma and aunts and great aunts and cousins and babies of cousins. It would be easy to spot my mom there, the loudest one in the room, and my grandma, the cute little lady whose favorite thing to say for the weekend was how it was a shame my mom's cousin had four grandchildren from three of her four children and none of them were married. That has south circa 1950 written all over it.
Also cool about this reunion is it was way multi-cultural. Between white wives and adopted white children it was a rainbow affair.
Saturday afternoon was free time so we hit the huge mall. The Off Fifth store had a great sale and who knew Old Navy had edgy clothes? Am I the last one to know they got an upgrade from tshirts and floral skirts? I got cute trench for a steal and this big striped tshirt dress.
After shopping we hit the heated pool.
That night we had our family banquet and everyone was asked to wear black,red, and/or white for the family picture. For the third time in two weeks (dont tell) I wore the dress from my graduation party because I felt good in it and it fit the requested colors perfectly. We had a auction where you bid on wrapped gifts and didnt get to see what it was until you bought it. I was already having fun bidding on things and after the husband of the host got a two night stay at the embassy suites for $50, everybody really was stepping up the bidding. Though I bid a lot and I only one once - a framed photo of my great-grandma katie who I am named for which was so appropriate.
Next it was time to dance. I was a little leery of a dance floor at a family event, especially with some of those older cousins giving me that "you surely have turned out nicely" look. But with the electric slide followed by the cha cha they knew how to get folks on the dance floor. I had the best dance partner in the room - JJ, my seven year old buddy who I was suppose to baby sit. Though it was our first time meeting he quickly took to me and begged me to come paly more cards with him afterwards. Cutest kid ever and clever as hell!
So it was great, and I didnt hang to hard at the bar downstairs because you know how the embassy suites are set up and you can see everyone's comings and goings.
And all the family reunion characters were there, along with that older cousin who makes you uncomfortable is
the "If you weren't my cousin" Cousin.
This is that cousin you meet for the first time at the reunion and when you see them hope you aren't related because they are kinda cute. yeah, he was so there and had "the back."
So instead of thinking about some sixth cousin , and giving proof to being called a country bumpkin by JE at work, Im enjoying the single-dating life . . .
CJ